When-Then…

It was the first time I have ever been called a chameleon. We were at the beach this summer with a group of friends and our children.  About halfway through the week, the children were in bed and the adults were talking and laughing and enjoying the company.  One of the men spoke up and asked what my ‘sign’ was.  I half-heartedly giggled and expressed that I didn’t follow horoscopes.  He shrugged and repeated his question, “O.k., but what is your sign?”  I sighed and stated that I am a Gemini.  He confidently said, “Well…that explains a lot!  You are a lot like me.  You can blend in anywhere you go and get along with anyone…just like a chameleon!”  Before I knew it, this statement had fed my fleshly ‘people pleasing ego’ and frankly, I was pretty proud to resemble this remark!

I thought about this conversation several times over the summer and each time felt a strange sense of accomplishment for being perceived this way. Then it happened.  One morning during my quiet time with Jesus, He gently whispered to me, “Why is this so important to you?  Daughter, in your life, being a chameleon has not been a positive thing.  Instead, it has resulted in you repeatedly conforming to the patterns of this world.”  Ouch.  He nailed it.  This ignited me to begin thinking about this burden of people pleasing and how God does not call us to blend in, He calls us to stand out!  I looked up the word chameleon on http://www.freedictionary.com and felt such a heaviness at what I saw.  The definition staring me in the face was, “a changeable or inconsistent person.”  Now do not get me wrong.  I believe that in order to be fully surrendered to God, something I desperately crave, we need to be flexible to change and move as He stirs us.  In my life though, this inconsistent person was constantly changing in hopes of obtaining the approval, acceptance, and unconditional love of others.  Me being a ‘changeable’ person in this life has often looked opposite of someone wanting to please God.  2 Timothy 2:9 says this, “For God saved us and called us to live a holy life.”  My inconsistent life choices certainly did not look like someone in pursuit of a holy life.  I found myself having conversations with God about how hard it was to so desperately want this holy life but to be surrounded by all of the same things of this world.  At this moment, God knew what I needed…a confident heart.  He began emptying me of my self-destructive thoughts and filling me with a peace that only He can provide.  This journey has only just begun…and I have a long way to go…but…He is filling me up with His promises…promises that I am tightly clinging to…promises like this…

WHEN I am faced with temptation to not be true to myself in order to gain the approval of others, THEN I will remember that I have an audience of ONE!

WHEN I am being bold in my love for Jesus and am facing persecution from others, THEN I will remember 1 Peter 4:14, “So be happy when you are insulted for being a Christian, for then the glorious Spirit of God rests upon you.”

WHEN I am faced with situations that threaten to lead me back down the path of being a ‘warm’ Christian, THEN…I will remember the ultimate sacrifice that He made…for me…and I will thank Him for His endless pursuit of my heart <3.